Pimento Cheese
“It’s hard to make good food with bad food.”
No, I did not have a southern grandmother that passed down her secret recipe for pimento cheese. All my opinions regarding this wonderful cheese spread have developed strictly from eating lots of it. And making some along the way. Even before I worked in cheese, I would make batches for my then-boyfriend (now husband) and his roommates to expand their taste for pimento cheese beyond the homogeneous pink tub from the grocery store.
Now, I’m not saying that all pimento cheese sucks that isn’t made with the finest ingredients. But because it’s so few ingredients, and you aren’t actually cooking anything, starting with the best stuff will make it better. Apologies if your southern grandmother disagrees.
Piquillo peppers are my roasted, jarred pepper of choice. Bright and sweet, their beautiful color and tender texture make them extremely versatile peppers, and freaking delicious in pimento cheese.
I grew up in a Miracle Whip household. Which, (no offense, Mom) isn’t mayonnaise. It tastes entirely different and shouldn’t ever take the place of real mayo in a recipe. It has its place, but not in my pimento cheese. If my fridge is well-stocked, I’ll go with a half and half mix of Kewpie and Hellman’s. If not, just the Hellman’s.
And the most important part… the CHEESE! Because I’m always extra when it comes to cheese, I normally use 3, sometimes 4 different cheeses. Yes. I know. I’m extra. But they all serve a purpose and contribute to the final product. You need sharpness, creaminess, sweetness, butteriness, little crunchy crystals, saltiness, and yes, yellowness. I’m not normally a proponent of yellow cheese. But in this case, it’s necessary.
While I love cookbooks and their recipes, I don’t use one for pimento cheese - just a basic formula to start, then feel it out from there. I’ll add everything together in a bowl and mix it up. If it seems dry, I’ll add some additional mayo. If I’m feeling frisky, I’ll stir in some grainy mustard, a roasted jalapeño or even some chopped cooked bacon. And if it’s not intended for my husband and his friends, I’ll add something green like chives, green onions or parsley.
Don’t be afraid to try different combinations of cheeses, spices and extra mix-ins. Feel it out and make it your own. I’m sure your southern grandmother will still love you.
“No Recipe” Pimento Cheese
Makes 1 quart
4 cups assorted shredded cheese, 1.30 - 1.50 total lbs
1 cup mayonnaise, plus more if needed
½ cup chopped piquillo peppers, about 8 peppers
Salt and pepper
Assorted mix-ins
Remove the rind and grate each cheese on the large hole side of a box grater. Add to large bowl.
Add mayonnaise and chopped peppers and stir until combined. If mixture seems too dry, add additional mayonnaise, one tablespoon at a time. Stir in additional mix-ins and season with salt and pepper to taste.
Serve with crackers, bread and crudité, use on a grilled cheese sandwich or stir into mac and cheese.
Mix-in examples:
Spices
Cumin, cayenne, mustard powder, onion powder, garlic powder, harissa, paprika, Aleppo pepper, red pepper flakes
Herbs
Green onion, chive, parsley, thyme, cilantro
Dry ingredients - chopped or minced as needed
Bacon, salami, roasted jalapeño or poblano, pickled red onion, garlic, radish
Wet ingredients
Grainy or Dijon mustard, hot sauce, Worcestershire sauce, sour cream, prepared horseradish
